Hate Taking Tests?

Instant Alchemy Tip

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Does taking tests feel out of control, dependent, at risk of failure?

Look closely: Does the pending test, which hasn’t happened, actually “make” you feel afraid, judged, and out of control–or are the fearful or frustrating thoughts *about* the test causing it?

Knowing that you are more than good enough to pass the test, how much more likely is feeling approval, worthy, peaceful, and calm, to help you pass the test?

Feeling that way, does a test matter?

Wanting a sense of acceptance “from” a successful test; you are not accepting yourself. If you do not accept yourself, why should others (like examiners) accept you? If you do not accept yourself, how well will you perform?

Who’s approval did you need?

If you fear someone potentially making a “dumb” judgment call that results in a failed test, who is feeling judgment? Who is actually judging whom? (Even before the test has begun!)

Tests can take you places, so shift your state and enjoy the ride,

Cindy

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Discover Lasting Happiness and Inner Peace

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Cindy Teevens is one of the leading inner peace and happiness facilitators, exceptional and unique in helping people shift their state and transform their lives permanently, from the inside out.

Six years after the violent suicide of her father, in one moment her own intense suffering was swapped for amazing joy, altering her life permanently. Happiness and peace became her predominant states. Laughter exploded at the simplicity and power of it, and tears of gratitude flowed. Understandings began to come about how we have been living backwards, how we have mistaken the outside for the inside, and how we have tethered ourselves to the uncontrollable winds of change in the midst of freedom—and how we can return to truth, sanity, and peace.

Nobody is Ever Rude

Discover how nobody is actually ever rude, and therefore
your whole experience and perspective can be turned around
from aggression to compassion and peace.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAHeading out for a walk with a friend, she started out in an exasperated state, complaining that Americans are rude. Then the story unfolds about how she went to an event with hundreds of people and was about to sit down when a woman came over and told her, “That’s Amanda’s seat!”

My friend continued, “She was so rude! And it was how she said it, with that tone of voice.” Now this friend has known me long enough to know something about my perspective, and she was not particularly surprised to hear me say, “No-one is ever rude to you,” but she was resistant.

But what if they ARE being rude?! She said emphatically.

“They never are.” I responded with a knowing beyond conviction, and I continued, reminding her that whenever you point a finger and judge someone, there are three fingers pointing back at you. But until you experience a shift in state and perspective using Alchemy, you will only know such truth “mentally,” as mere thought-knowledge, which you won’t believe, and still feeling affronted by apparent rudeness, you will walk, and talk accordingly.

So let’s walk through the practice, and shift state.

1) What does she want? She wanted that woman to speak kindly and politely.

2) How does that woman speaking kindly and politely feel? Calm, kind, respected, safe, and peaceful. Here is where the power is in the presence. Feeling into the body, looking for the answer there, how does calm, kind, respectful, safe, and peaceful feel? Anyone reading this now can know this feeling in the body. Seek it, then when you find it, take some time and recognize, enjoy, and appreciate it.

3) Is this how you prefer to feel? Yes. It is safe, secure, and grounded.

4) Who or what did you need to have this? Did you need this woman to be kind or polite? No.

5) What do you think of her now? Oh, it’s not a big deal, she was probably just doing her job and saving her friend’s seat. Or maybe she just got some bad news, and is in a bad state, or maybe she’s stressing over something that happened or could happen. I see now…there are numberless possibilities.

6) Feeling this way, how do you act? Calm? Yes. Kind? Yes. Respectful? Yes. Polite? Yes. Who did you need to be calm, kind, and respectful? Me. So who was being rude? Ohhh…me. (And they say Canadians are polite : )

Yes…How? By believing that she was being rude, by being upset with her, by judging her, by telling others that Americans are rude. Feeling calm, kind, and polite, I might even say, “Oh, sorry, I didn’t know.”

7) Is this how you prefer to act? Yes.

Often, the heart cracks open, and invulnerable universal love can be known.

People do what they do, in the tone that they do, because of themselves, their state, their perceived problem–not yours. And if you cared enough about the other to shift your state and perspective (and mind reads) and/or to inquire whether or not they are okay, you’d discover that your belief or fear has nothing to do with whatever “tone” they seem to be using. The tone you are hearing is a thought in your head, what you are perceiving, and the meaning your are giving that tone, is your meaning–not theirs. It is not their truth. If you are feeling rude (or anything else), and you do not look closely at what’s really going on, at what the real cause it, in your confusion you will mentally project the cause onto others.

By shifting your state, you can come to realize that what you thought happened, didn’t actually happen. People are never rude. They are hurting, suffering, fearful, and/or confused. The American wasn’t being rude, and this is the ultimate in forgiveness, when you realize there is nothing to forgive.

Even you, the Canadian, weren’t rude…you were feeling bad and on the defensive, which is the same as offensive. You were confused, and now you can forgive yourself too.

What is “being rude” anyway? Is it raising their voice? Is it not giving you what you want? Is it not being sweet as pie? Is it being strong and firm? All it is, is a thought you can get upset over. I asked my friend if she really thought this stranger intentionally decided to be rude to her, to hurt her with rudeness. The answer was no.

Even if someone’s intention was to be rude (and you can never know for certain someone’s state or intention)–so what? Let them have it…their bad state can only hurt them, just as it is only ever your bad state that hurts you. To claim to know someone’s state or intention is a mental violence, and it is mental violence that can lead to physical war.

The thought someone is being rude has no purpose other than to cause you stress. However it is just a thought, and as thought, anything can be imagined. Yet even imaginary pain, stress or anger, is still pain, stress or anger. Of course, this is not to say that you lose the ability or discretion to choose who to hang around with and who’s presence to leave; it’s that you do it with clarity, without false mind reads about the other person, without your own fears or attachments fogging your view, and with peace and wisdom. It is the habit of not seeing that our mind reads even exist, and of automatically believing whatever bad thought-feeling arises to be truth, that keeps us bound.

If you struggle with people never being rude, then you have not shifted state. You may be focused on some other negative thought-feeling, belief, or attachment, from which you cannot see anything else.

Perhaps without realizing it, with that tone of voice and complaint, my friend was asking me to also judge this stranger, and that I can never do. I refuse to support my friend’s suffering and confusion, which in turn would support and feed the social cycle of mass unconsciousness and suffering. Instead, I have compassion for her, the wish that she not suffer with anger, disrespect, and judgment.

Be the change you want to see. After all, you demanded it of them.

This is good news; it means you are free, you don’t have to feel bad every time someone raises their voice, and you can have compassion, and peace. Ultimately, you are the authority of your perception in your life, and that which you are most interested in, you will experience. Which do you prefer?

 

Join the Inner Alcove and Get Personal and Community Support in using Alchemy to Be the Change: http://InnerAlcove.com/join

cindy_book

Cindy Teevens

Cindy Teevens is one of the leading inner peace and happiness facilitators, exceptional and unique in helping people shift their state and transform their lives permanently, from the inside out. Six years after the violent suicide of her father, in one moment her own intense suffering was swapped for amazing joy, altering her life permanently. Happiness and peace became her predominant states. Laughter exploded at the simplicity and power of it, and tears of gratitude flowed. Understandings began to come about how we have been living backwards, how we have mistaken the outside for the inside, and how we have tethered ourselves to the uncontrollable winds of change in the midst of freedom—and how we can return to truth, sanity, and peace.

 

Do Relationships Become Stagnant After Two Years?

relationship

What a dangerous statement. (Sheesh I wonder what happens after 20 years? Do relationships mould and rot in a stench? If that were true, why would anyone stay together? It’d be… “Oh, it’s two years plus one day… time to part.”)

That’s like saying life becomes stagnant after two years! There is no such thing as stagnancy. Everything is constantly changing. Even mind, which can stink with the idea of stagnancy, is always changing, moment to moment.

This belief was posted somewhere online, as a factual claim.

As long as our “experts” feed society with ideas like this, people will suffer. They will never come to understand the true cause of stagnancy and so never know the infinite richness that all of life, including being in a relationship or not, offers.

This claim may have evolved from some survey asking people about their experiences in relationships. Note the difference between the majority of people’s experiences, and a FACT that is always true for everyone, which nothing can be done about. Massive difference. Merely because the majority of relationships are dysfunctional does not mean that relationships become stagnant after two years as a fundamental truth.

It is possible to think that relationships getting stagnant is “normal” simply because it seems everyone else is having the same experience. Sharing the same experience , we may not even notice that it’s not healthy, because we think it’s “normal.” What is common does not mean normal, healthy, factual, actual, or truthful. Our experts are not immune to this either, and believing their stats to be some kind of truth, they can actually become the  “sneezer,” spreading such contagious ideas. Because they are our experts, we tend to believe them, further feeding the unconscious outbreak.

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” ~ Krishnamurti

Statistics alone are mere indicators, pointers, but are nothing real. One must notice the two-year milestone is not an immutable law that applies to everyone, and then go deeper and ask why are the majority of people experiencing this? (Or better yet, why do some not experience it?) Something fundamental must be being missed and/or we are confused. Something must be wrong with what we think we know about relationships, experience, and happiness.

One of the biggest, most rampant beliefs society carries about relationships is that people make you happy. Almost everyone believes that the pinnacle, the peak, the height in happiness is having a loving relationship with another person. What if it’s not true? What if there is a greater love experience possible? What if you can have it any time, with or without a relationship? What if we have confused it for relationships? What if it comes without the need, attachment, and pain that our current belief about intimate love carries?

As long as people believe that people (or things, or events) “make” them happy or unhappy, they make rules for things, people, or events, and those rules are what make us happy or unhappy. Those rules limit how much happiness, love, and peace you can experience (I call this the “False Happiness Hierarchy”), based on what things you do (or don’t) have, what people do (or don’t do), or what events do (or don’t) take place. You are voluntarily tethered to the winds of unreliable constant outer change. Being rules you set, these are not fundamental truths; they are choices.

Drop all your stagnant thoughts and watch everything come to life beyond belief! Because it’s your beliefs that have stagnated your experience of life. Nothing about life is ever stagnant.

NOTE: Alchemy for Couples in the Love Before You Think(TM) program is coming soon. This program will help you side-step all limiting beliefs about you and your partner, bypass the past, and start truly living now. You don’t have to wait and you don’t have to wait on your partner either, you can start right now in the Inner Alcove. Click here.

Putting an end to mental pain and suffering–and sleepless nights

How to deal with feeling adequate,
and get a good night’s rest

Client: In the middle of the night snoozing is all I managed. I slept 45 minutes or so between 4–5:20 and again from 6:20–7:50. Going to try a little more.

Cindy: So is mind running around some topic?

Client: Last night it seemed to be a cumulative thing. But definitely areas we can target tonight (on the teleclass.)

Cindy: Cumulative… There is no such thing. There can only be a thought about cumulative, believed in. How does that thought feel, good or bad?

(NOTE: Client has worked with me before and knows that by asking this question I am pointing to the fact she is putting her attention on a bad-feeling thought, and am doing that just to bring it to her awareness.)

Client: I guess I was just having trouble pinpointing what it was, so I examined all things I was concerned about. And thinking of the cumulative was my attempt to understand what was causing the alertness and racing thoughts. It all seemed to center around a feeling of inadequacy and a little bit of fear of dying tried to creep in. Inadequacy to handle all things in and around the move and setting things up.

Cindy: Yes. The whys are where the suffering lies. Do you see it now?

(NOTE: Client knows not to seek reasons/mental understanding – i.e. not to think. When feeling bad you are like a bad-thought magnet, and will find many reasons to support or worsen suffering. The instructions here are to just notice the already present painful thought—not to think about it or seek more. Examining all the things you are concerned about will most certainly keep you awake. What is causing alertness and racing thought *is* entertaining bad feeling thoughts themselves. Nothing else. There is nothing else going on at 4am.)

Client: Yes.

Cindy: When you know a bag is full of garbage, do you go rummaging around in it?

Client: No.

Cindy: Looking for a cause (a.k.a “a why”)… What will you find? What help is there in putting attention on a bad-feeling-thought about why? Will that let you sleep?

Client: I was trying to find what I needed.

(NOTE: The first question in the Alchemy practice is to ask yourself “What do I want?” not “What do I need?” You need nothing. Your natural state is peace and joy. It is only when you have some “thing”–like a bad-feeling thought–that your natural peace and joy is disturbed. The thought idea you need something is attachment, and disturbing. That said, what you want is the opposite of what you don’t want, the opposite of whatever bad feeling thought is already present. That is enough to work with—don’t seek more! Oh what tangled webs we weave when we rummage through the garbage. What you want is positive, and feels good. What you think you need–and thereby don’t have–feels bad. Put your attention on what you DO want, not what you don’t want.)

Cindy: Notice that any “why” thought feels bad, and turn away from them, don’t seek them. Seek what you DO want. (–Seek joy!)

Client: No, searching through whys does not help. It’s a reflex I need to stop.

Cindy: This is why I say what you need is POSITIVE. You were not seeking what you wanted, you were seeking what you did not want. And you got it. Of course.

Client: Poo.

Client: lol

Cindy: hahaha…A *very* good and solid learning.

Client: Yes. We can learn from our mistakes.

Cindy: Yes. A great gift : ).

(Note: Searching through whys is not a reflex. That would make it some conceptual “thing” you have to battle against–but it does not exist. Simply noticing that it hurts, noticing that it never works is enough for you to give it up. When you are not interested in the garbage, it is gone. From a good feeling you can notice all the ways and truths about how more than adequate you are–but you won’t see that, feel that, or know that while feeling something called inadequacy. Learn to shift your state so you have access to wisdom and more options. Get personal support while using the 7 Questions called Alchemy)

The Truth About Happiness Webinar

Technology is making it possible to present the happiness lie, and the truth about happiness, around the world, live, right from my office.

FREE – Thursday, June 26th, 9PM EST.

We are launching the first ever free world-wide, public webinar on the Alchemy of Love and Joy. I will state the case for the lie and the truth, introduce listeners to the Three Powers you were born with, and offer to walk people through the life-altering practice of Alchemy as well as take questions and answers if there is time. You can participate or just watch and listen from the comfort of your home. If you want to participate you must have a google+ account (they are free here) and a webcam.

To participate, register ahead of time, join here.

To just watch, visit this page.

This will be the first of many, so be sure to join – you will  hear about additional free webinars on love, relationships, career, and inner peace and freedom.

Antidepressant drugs may make mental illness worse

Research shows SSRIs reduce brain’s capacity to produce serotonin

Pills_wikimediaChris Wodskou of CBC news reports, “What if mental illnesses like depression aren’t really caused by chemical imbalances, and that millions of the people who are prescribed those drugs derive no benefit from them? And what if those drugs could actually make their mental illness worse and more intractable over the long term?” Continue reading

Nothing New on a Detour

roadOn the road, detouring through a new town that these eyes have never seen, still there is a knowing, a recognition of something that has not changed with the clocking of kilometers.

Nothing here is new. Nothing here is not known. Nothing here is separate. There is an alive freshness, though not a strangeness. There is a sameness.

Actually, it’s been that way the whole trip; something has stayed the same, all the way from Brampton; it was just made so much more obvious when seeing new objects in a new town. A vastness, peace, and joy comes with this eternal, unchanging recognition. This is true wherever you go; check it out for yourself. (Odessa, Ontario, June 2, 2014.)

Wherever you go, there you are ~ Jon Kabat-Zinn

 

Is it true that once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen?

Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen. ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Does Emerson have it right, that once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen? That may be what appears  to happen, but knowing what I know now, after what happened to me in the woods, I know that nothing is separate, and that there is no separate “me” deciding. Continue reading