On January 8th, 2010 a video was posted on YouTube of a man in Yosemite National Park witnessing a complete double rainbow.

As of today it has 33,396,614 views!

(click the picture above to view it)

Many of you have probably seen a double rainbow, and may wonder, what’s the big deal? Other than the fact that at one point the rainbow was complete, going all the way from one side to the other, it was the man’s reaction to the experience that resulted in the video’s wild popularity. He exclaims “Oh my god” over and over, crying and laughing in ecstasy, asking “what does it mean?!”

The responses to the video range from rude, crude and ridicule, with accusations of him being sexuality stimulated or being high on drugs, with commands to “take a pill” or to come down, to awe and appreciation. Mostly, they are the former group.

There are confused comments from people who wonder how he could be so ecstatic, and who just cannot understand his response. That is no wonder to me, in a world where we have been raised to believe that things or people make us happy. We have been conditioned to think that we can only feel good when we get some candy, a new toy, a new lover, a new baby, a new house, and that the degree of joy is dictated by the object, and that most objects are mundane.

For instance, you can only feel so good while eating candy, which is a different level of pleasure from being with a lover. So not only do we need something or someone outside of ourselves in the first place, but even when we get them, we limit our degree of happiness based on the object or person. Everything else in life is “normal” and unremarkable. People have been lulled into a dull, boring, mundane, needy, attached existence in the very midst of awe-inspiring mystery and freedom.

There is nothing “normal” about every day life. Existence, of anything, is in itself a miracle. People do not know how we came here, what we are doing here, or what happens after here. Neither scientists***, nor religious leaders can explain consciousness and experiencing. At least not to the mind. No one even knows how a tiny bud comes into existence.

There are no ordinary moments – Dan Millman, Way of the Peaceful Warrior

I discovered that everyone is capable of such joy, and that it has nothing to do with drugs or sex, although it can seem quite orgasmic. In a sense, you could call it a spiritual orgasm. And mind cannot comprehend it, thus perhaps the questioning “what does it mean?” That is about all mind can do with it because “direct seeing,” Being, cannot be grasped by mind. Mind is blown away, and bliss remains. One experience of mine was quite similar; causeless, infinite joy was awakened, and I can attest that the intensity can include crying and laughing at the same time. It’s rapture can be sudden and explosive; all consuming.

There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle or you can live as if everything is a miracle. – Albert Einstein

What does it mean?

It means this man quit limiting how good he can feel based on a thought that came from someone else. It means he quit seeing the world with mundane, dull eyes, but saw directly and clearly the miracle of experience. It means he stopped controlling, he let go, and he got out of the way of himself. As this man discovered, he is capable of much more love and joy than he lived–or imagined. Joy for the sheer joy of joy, and no other reason. You see, the double rainbow itself was not it. That was not the “cause” of his joy, which ordinary mind seems to need and seek in order to justify feeling good (thereby usually justifying feeling mundane, or even bad).

The inquiring mind wants to know, and with this question, it makes itself restless, creating suffering, until it either believes it knows or stops needing to know. What is the meaning of happiness? If you cannot find a meaning, should we dump happiness? If you cannot find a meaning, does it mean that you are not having the experience? Mind is so powerful it can actually discount, deny, degrade, distort, or even “delete” an experience, and it can do that to anything which it cannot understand but thinks it must. Mind’s loss. The people who gain a miniscule pleasure from devaluing such an experience do not know what they are trading it for.

Most people limit their potential, and their experience in and of this life, due to what? Fear of embarrassment, mostly. Who’s loss? When you start acknowledging the miracle, mystery and beauty around you, you will begin to know and experience the miracle, mystery and beauty within you.

The text posted below the rainbow video says “Look into the mirror, look into your soul!” In the video’s comments, there are (few) people who accept that the “double rainbow man” is having an experience of God, and there are people who deny God has anything to do with rainbows, that is it just natural science (and nature has nothing to do with God, right?). People can speak as if they have the authority of absolute knowledge, when they do not even know what the world, experience, themselves, God, or consciousness actually are. They speak merely from belief or conceptual parroting of learned words; learned knowledge mistaken for the wisdom of Knowing.

What is Consciousness?

***There is one man who I just discovered, who comes close to ratifying science with the inexplicable, with consciousness. Watch Peter Russell’s presentation on “The Primacy of Consciousness” below. (A must watch; just over an hour, and worth every minute.) But do not stop at intellectual understanding, because even Peter admits that knowing it as thought is not Knowing It. Knowing It, you know the joy of all experiences from the sublime to the ecstatic, the joy of all creatures great and small – and the joy of all things from a blade of grass to a double rainbow.

When car and scooter meet, scooter loses.

The explosion rattled my ears, and the last thought was “Not again!?”

There was a sense of humour in that thought, in the midst of the world once again moving faster than mind. A little over a year ago I was a passenger in a car that was hit from behind while waiting at a red light.  We all had the same experience, that there was an explosion, and a “long time” after it, during which we wondered what the explosion was – until we realized it was us. By then we had crossed the intersection to the other side; and very fortunately we were not hit by cross-traffic.

Pulling over, we put together in thought and words what had happened, in our apparent absence, yet not. “Ah, yes, we must have been hit from behind.” It’s not that mind is just slow, the mind is also after the fact. We do things, and long after we are done, there is mind piping-up, noting the past, and in some instances even claiming that it “decided” to do it.

Back then I still thought I was mind, so there I was, still catching up in thought with what had already happened, feeling shocked by the “time” that “I” had “lost.” The pain in the back of my neck prompted the medics to strap me to a board and haul me to the hospital. Fortunately nothing was broken, and yet after more than a year the resulting bulging disk had still not healed.

But that was all less than a split-second memory because this impact reefed my shoulders, head, and neck backwards as the body immediately contracted and recoiled in a futile attempt to keep it all together. Then the hood of the car hit my back and flung me in the opposite direction, which meant, I knew, wordlessly, that the car was still coming at me. Completely disoriented, I rolled instinctively until I could get my bearings to ensure that I was rolling in the right direction–out of harm.

The scooter shot across two lanes, and once again I was thankful there was no cross traffic. The driver of the car was shocked but unhurt. My legs shook uncontrollably and a short while later, the emergency vehicles began to arrive. Most of the pain seemed the same as the old injury, only aggravated, and the x-rays showed nothing broken. But when the doctor cautiously opened the neck brace and checked my neck, pressing along it, one spot drew a squeal from me, and I said “That was new!” He quickly closed the neck brace, strapping me back in, and ordered a CAT scan.

For the first time there was the thought something could be seriously wrong. Waiting for the test results, I stared in the only direction I could, straight up. Looking at the honeycomb shape of the ceiling light, the beauty of the shape and light grew more and more apparent. Then questions began to arise, “What if I need a cast for a year?” Followed by “What if I never walk again?” The light seemed to grow intensity and beauty, along with an inner peace. The reply came, “I am okay. And in either case, I can still write and speak.” Mind settled, giving way to knowing. Knowing that nothing matters, and so I’m okay, no matter what.

The CAT scan showed something not quite right, but it was good enough to let me leave, with the advice to get an MRI test done. I walked of the hospital very thankful, and grateful, very happy and blissful.

That night the tingles started in my arm, moving all the way down to my hand, and into my fingers. That was followed by a throbbing and pounding sensation as if circulation was being cut off. The MRI revealed what the symptoms knew: the disk had herniated. And so began again the therapy and healing, and yet there was one thing notably absent, suffering over any of it. It is as always, just this moment, just this therapy, just this pain, just this rest, just this ice, just this heat, just this stretch, just this now. None of it stays the same, it is ever changing, I, notice. And all of this happens within a bigger context. With attention on the infinite context, all is well.

Once again, half a year later, I am back to yoga, and gentle walk-running, and seeing ever more clearly, how life can turn on a dime, in an instant, how every just now is fleeting, precious, and beautiful, how mind is only a tool to be used–not to be used by–and that there is something far greater, always there, for the noticing.

Transcription coming.

Participant discovers

• that honesty and unconditional love come from within, not from another
• in mind reading someone else, you will not have honesty (truth), you will have your own fear’s false belief.
• what was wanted was the feeling of unconditional love, and until you have it, your vision will be conditional
• it is your lack of honesty and unconditional love that you see

Transcription

Basically how it works is, I ask a series of questions.

Okay.

and your job is to just stay focused on the questions as much as possible, and not just on the questions, but on answering the questions, okay?

Okay, say that one more time, I want to make sure I am hearing you again, stay focused on the question?

Yeah, and on the answer of the question, on the answer, okay?

Okay.

Because there’s been a habit, everyone has had the habit of focusing on the opposite of these answers, so

Gotcha.

Yeah this is going to be an interesting experience.

Okay, I’m excited!

Alright. So can you think of a time when you were okay, and then something happens, you see something or someone says something, and you feel bad?

Yes.

Okay, so you were fine one moment, and then you’re not the next, right?

Yes.

So here’s the first question, in that moment, when you notice you feel bad, what do you want?

Uhhhhh…in that moment when I feel bad, what do I want. To not feel bad [laughter].

Alright, that’s a pretty honest answer, but I want it to be even more honest. You know like a child would answer? When candy or a toy is taken away, and they feel bad, what do they want? They want the candy or the toy, right?

Yeah. The instance that I was thinking about when you asked the question, what I wanted was honesty.

From someone else.

Yes.

Okay perfect. You want honesty, who doesn’t?

Right.

Let’s go with that. So the next question is, how does honesty feel?

It feels great, it feels like I have choice, it feels real, I guess like I have choices…is the best way I can describe it.

Okay great, anything else? You have choices, it feels real, what else? Anything?

Uhm..I don’t know it feels like…Uhm…true love

True love. Yeah, honesty is true love, isn’t it?

Unconditional love.

Unconditional, yeah same thing, but I know what you are saying with the unconditional. Perfect. So…those are good mental answers, those are the thought answers. Now we want to take them a little further. So, wherever you are right now I want you to feel your feet. You don’t have to move them, just feel into them because you probably weren’t feeling them before, right?

Say that again?

Can you feel your feet right now?

Yes.

You weren’t aware of them before I asked you to do that, right?

No.

Okay. Now can you feel the top of your head?

Yes.

Can you do both at the same time.

Yes.

All right and now take in your peripheral vision. Okay?

Okay.

And finally, your breath, feel it moving in and out, doing this all at once.

Okay.

Now what do you notice?

I don’t know…What did you say about my peripheral vision?

Just take it in so that you can see, if there are walls around you, you can see the side walls. You can see the wall in front of you, and you can also see the ones on the side, right?

So breathing in and out, peripheral vision, and head and feet?

Yeah. Got it?

Okay, we’ll see.

What do you notice when you do that?

I don’t know – my breathing slowed down.

Ah ha. If your breathing slowed down, do you think you’re more relaxed?

Oh yah.

Okay, so just doing that alone, coming to your senses – literally coming to your senses alone will help.

Okay.

And I always want you to do that before you ask the second question, okay?

Okay.

Which is “So how does having honesty, and choices, and unconditional love feel? and answer it with your body, as your body, as a feeling in the body.

Warm.

Uh huh.

uhm…Kinda like what …butterflies in my heart uhm…I guess that would be it…Very warm!

Very warm. The longer you put your attention on this, the warmer it will get.

Really?!

Yeah. Especially…

So I’m doing it right, huh?

You are doing it right.

Especially with the next request, which is to just appreciate that warmth, butterflies.

Okay.

What happens when you appreciate it?

I don’t know.

You don’t know?

I feel the same.

Any change at all?

No, not really.

Are you appreciating? Appreciating the fact that you can do this? Just because you can?

Am I saying in my head I appreciate the fact that I can do this? Am I just thinking about being appreciative.

No, don’t think about being appreciative. Just enjoy…

Okay.

First enjoy it, and then appreciate the enjoyment.

It makes me smile!

Ah there you go. Alright. Good, ok.

So is this how you prefer to feel?

Yes.

So just enjoy that for another moment.

If you play with this later, you can alternate between appreciating it and enjoying it, and watch what happens. Okay?

Say that one more time?

Just alternate between appreciating it and enjoying it. You are enjoying it, and then appreciate the feeling the sensations, that you have it. What you will find is that it will grow. Your smile is an indication that it grew. And then you can appreciate the smile and everything, and then you do it again, and it will grow, and it will grow.

[giggle]

Yeah, it’s great!

ok [giggle laughter]

At some point mind might come in and go “Aw, you can’t feel that good.” If you believe it [laughter]…Ok, if you put your attention on it…. If you don’t believe it, if you don’t put your attention on it …and you say yah, but it is …right here right now, right?

But, yeah!

Yeah. [laughter]

Alright. Okay. You can kind of get a grasp on it, kind of hold it, it’s like an energy in your body right?

Yes.

Ok good. So hold onto that, when I ask you the next question. Who or what did you need to have this?

You said who or what did I need to have this?

Yeah.

This feeling?

Yeah. Did you need any…

No. Just me.

Just you?

Just me.

Well…I needed you, you know, to get me there…

Now you know the questions. Right?

Yes.

You can ask yourself?

Yes.

You know how to do it now, right?

Yes.

Ok good.

You just needed to know this was an option, right?

Yes.

Because we weren’t taught this.

That’s right.

We were taught how to suffer. We were taught what we didn’t want.

Yes.

When you were a kid and you were crying and your parents didn’t want to listen to you, what did they do?

I’m not gonna get that.

I’m not gonna get that? [laughter], okay. My parents sent me to my room.

Yeah okay.

What for? In my mind, okay that was the demand, right?  “If you want to cry, go to your room!”

Ohh.

So you go to your room, right? You cry, right?

Yeah.

You cry really hard. We learned how to suffer really well, but nobody ever said you could do the opposite.

That’s true.

‘Til now.

I really liked how you rather stay with this rather than go back into the past. That was great, I loved you attitude!

So feeling this warmth, this butterfly, the smiling, the breathing the relaxation, all of that. You didn’t need any body, you didn’t need anything – you didn’t need anybody’s honesty, did you?

No.

In order to feel unconditional love. So when you were needing honesty, were you giving unconditional love?

No.

So who was being dishonest?

Uhm…who was being dishonest with ….me?

No.

So I asked who was being dishonest in love.

 

Who was being dishonest in love…I guess it would be me, if I wasn’t giving unconditional love.

Right. Right. Ok. Feeling this way, sustain it, hold it, this warm butterfly relaxed unconditional love, because you do what it is, right, you do know how it feels?

Yeah.

Okay good…Do you have choices now?

Yes.

OK, good.

With these choice, what do you think of them now?

What do I think of the choices?

No. With these choices, and this feeling of unconditional love, what do you think of the person you thought who was being dishonest, and conditionally loving?

Uhm, what do I think of that person?

Yeah.

I love that person.

Beautiful. Okay.

What do you think of their actions, now? Sustaining this feeling.

I think that…I’m unsure of what their actions actually were…and more…concerned with where my mind was going with the situation…not necessarily…I didn’t know if they were being dishonest or not I just know how I felt at the time, or what I was thinking at the time.

Good for you. That is a big thing to realize because we never actually suffer as a direct result of what somebody does or says, we suffer about our beliefs about what they did or said.

Your gonna make me cry…[laughter] Not in a bad way…

I know, I know what you mean.

I really suggest you download the book because it talks a lot about mind reads. Mind reads are claiming to know what someone else’s intentions (or state) were. If you love this person, and if you what to have true open honesty and pure love with them, then when you notice a mind read, a bade feeling mind read, in your mind–its coming from you don’t forget, its not coming from them–ok?

Okay.

When you notice that, that’s a cue, to ask, first of all to shift your state like you just did, to ask yourself what you want and shift it, second of all, if you really still care to know something about that person, then ask them their purpose or intention

I hate to keep asking you repeat yourself but I want to be sure I understand you…what did you say again?

Ask them their purpose or intention. Say to them…If they learned what a mind read was, you could admit, “I have a mind read” and I’d really prefer to know what your purpose is, or how you are feeling. Use that to open the door to get to know them better.  To know the truth of the moment, rather than your fear of the moment.

Ok.

That’s what Alchemy is.

It’s very powerful.

Only when you are willing to look within, if you are willing to look within, it is completely powerful. You are completely powerful.

good for you, oh my god, full of love…

So amazed.

So you can do it any time and every time, and I’d love to head feedback, as to, you know, how it goes.

Okay – thank-you, so very much.

You are very welcome, thank-you for playing.

Love and joy to you.

You too.

What a strange statement to me. Of course, since the “gene connection” was made years ago, we’ve been saying variations of “It’s in you genes” since then; as if you were born that way, there’s no other option, and that’s the beginning and end of it. One of the best things I learned in high school was something more about genes than what scientists and the news usually present: the difference between phenotype and genotype.

At one time, I was deeply involved with horses. Horses are traditionally measured using your hand, from the ground to the top of the shoulders, and so we can describe a horse as being “16 hands high.” Anyway, I was fortunate that my Senior General Science class was about genetics, and I learned that while a horse might have genes that “say” it should be 16 hands high, it might in reality only reach 14 hands high.

That is the phenotype, the actual expression, which may be different from the genotype due to outside, environmental influences.

I knew of a “stunted” horse, who’s breed is normally at least 16 hands high, who only stood 14 hands, and I knew that his life included a history of abuse and nutritional deprivation. It was an unforgettable lesson that genes do not tell the whole story, do not control, and are not the ultimate authority that they are often presented to be.

All of this came back to me recently, while reading this article: “Genes are the key to happiness” where scientists have discovered that happy people have a longer version of a gene than those who are unhappy. But does that mean those given the “short end of the gene” are doomed to misery? The fact that genes are inherited does not mean that they have to be expressed, nor that they do not change. Scientists have simply noted that there is a link between longer genes and happiness, not which is the cause of which. When scientists first discovered genes and began to explore their function, they assumed that the genes came first, and the effect came second.

Some years ago I learned about the work of Dr. Bruce Lipton, who, upon discovering that the environment (body, world, and belief) actually affects the genes, he realized we had been looking from a backwards perspective. He dropped everything and now teaches what is called “The New Biology,” which he confesses is actually very old, and already previously known by (w)holistic doctors long ago. His work, which goes against ingrained, western scientific thinking and conditioning, is gradually gaining ground.

The article concedes: “Of course, our well-being isn’t determined by this one gene – other genes and especially experience throughout the course of life will continue to explain the majority of variation in individual happiness.” Yet the scientists, news, and the population still look for a singular “cause” to grasp and label, perhaps in the hopes of finding a simple, fast cure. And so the “happy gene” article contradicts itself and concludes: “But this finding helps to explain why we each have a unique baseline level of happiness and why some people tend to be naturally happier than others, and that’s in no small part due to our individual genetic make-up.”

Before I discovered the inner source of joy, my level of happiness was extremely low for a few months, and then in a flash, it shot up for many months and later leveled-off somewhere higher than my “normal.” Could the genes have somehow dramatically changed? Supposedly, as the unchanging, inherited “cause” of happiness, they cannot.

This risk of believing that your genes can dictate your happiness is that, if believed to be so, it will be so, and therefore appear as if so. In working with others, I have repeatedly found that the biggest “dictating” factor in happiness is what you believe. And it is not the “what” but the “you” who believes that is the dictator. When you stop believing you must feel bad, then you do. When you stop believing a whole host of “feel bad” thoughts, your relative level of happiness can also skyrocket, beyond belief.

Whether or not happiness beyond belief actually affects the genes is unknown. Whether it does or not, radically or gradually or not, does not really matter when it comes to happiness, which is always readily available. For other things like diseases, it could be what matters the most.

On his  YouTube video, Dr. Lipton states: “Cellular biologists now recognize that the environment, the external universe and our internal physiology, and more importantly, our perception of the environment, directly controls the activity of our genes.”

All of this points, once again, to non-separation. The genes are not separate from the environment, the environment is not separate from the genes. The cause is the effect, the effect is the cause. Genes may indicate, but not dictate, so you need not run out and get your genes measured.

Taking care of your inner and outer environment, things you have control of, can make an immediate, massive difference in the only thing that matters: your actual experience.

What does “Happiness is Within” mean in your actual life?

If that is truth for you, then it means that

• there is no clinging; you do not need anything nor anyone outside of you,
• your movement of attention when you seek well being is inward, not outward,
• you stop seeking happiness in things, people, or events.

It means equanimity, and the unshakeable peace that comes with it.

When people do think or say the words “Happiness is within,” most are just giving it “lip service.” For those people, it is just a nice theoretical thought they drop when it suits them – usually while counseling others. They say it just because it sounds good, and they generally only say it when things are going well. Few say and uphold it when things go awry.

This repeating of these words, of this information – called “knowledge” – is merely parroting. And like parrots, the words may be beautiful, but they are not intelligence. Neither are they living truth for you, it is just an idea, an ideal.

If you value integrity, then you will not parrot
what is not true and actual for you in your life.

If you value integrity, that can take you a long way to unveiling what this life is all about, who or what you are, how you came to be here, and what happens when the body drops. It can lead you to discover Truth.

Perhaps it was our reluctance to face the unknown and to seek such truths that led us, through fear, to accept and parrot words and thoughts that are just temporarily comforting concepts in our lives. But like a parrot that won’t quit, the spark of Truth is there, right now, nagging for each to see what has always been present and obvious. It just can’t be known while we believe in and parrot false knowledge that is not actual in your life.

While it’s “thoughts” are dead, the parrot is very much alive. It is a magical, delightful, mysterious, and colorful bird that is far more than the sounds it makes and hears. In the same way you are much more than mere thought, mere sounds, that we call words.

Yet concepts can be useful, provided they are recognized as concepts and not accepted as vague truth that you believe in, and not merely repeated as thought, and stopped at. Then it is a dead end.

So what to do instead? Hold faith, and prove it to yourself, with integrity. Stop. Turn away from the outside, turn away from outer need, fear, and thought, and turn within, every time. Learn to use the seven powerful questions of Alchemy to turn your attention inward, altering your experience “of” the “outside.” Remember to use suffering for the only thing is it good for, to wake you up out of unconsciousness and point you toward the joy within that never leaves you. Pain will remind you, and when in pain you have nothing to lose.

Except pain.

–

Listen in on the conversation as Cindy walks a participant through the practice of Alchemy. Notice that Cindy asks the questions in the now, and the participant tends to answer in the past until she has shifted state.
Here are some transcribed excerpts:

[Cindy]
“We don’t want things, people, or events, we want the feeling we mistake them for. If you have the relationship and you didn’t have a good feeling, would you want the relationship?”

[Participant]
“No.”

[Cindy]
“How does being in relationship feel? How does being full, appreciated, honoured, loved, validated, and unconditionally accepted feel?

[Participant]
“It feels foreign.”

Bonus Recording

The After Effects of Alchemy [12:55 min]

Listen to the thought-feeling “There’s so much suffering, and we are not even aware of it,” get turned-around with Alchemy, and how Cindy’s experience went from painful wanting to joy, to equanimity, to the purity of not judging good and bad.

————————————————————————————————————————————————–

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How much more free and loving could you then be in a relationship?

Some people are so shocked by the idea of not needing someone that they ask, “But, then what would a relationship be for?”

Such a response reveals how deeply their conditioning goes.

Both my generation and the current generation have been raised in a “romantic era” that is more accurately called an “attachment era.” The majority of our movies and music proclaim a love that needs the other, and that idea is portrayed as a good, romantic thing. Perhaps it comes from the fear of losing someone and therefore needing them to be your “only one” and “forever.”

Thus fear spawned relationships that are based on fear, but which are cloaked and labeled as love. This attachment love is about trading and goes something like: “You be this for me, and I’ll be this for you,” and we call that loving each other. In actually, it is more like raping each other! There are needs, and demands, and when they conflict and oppose each other it can get really ugly. Stand-back when things go awry and watch how suddenly “love” becomes venomous hate.

Of course at the root of this is the idea and belief that you are somehow incomplete, and that you need someone in order to be happy. This is because generation after generation has been raised with the erroneous fundamental belief that happiness is somehow found outside of you, in things, people, or events.

But we don’t want things, people, or events, we want the feeling we mistake them for—and if things or people were truly the cause of happiness, then once we got them, we’d be happily ever after. But we are not—because things, people, and events are not the cause or source of happiness. Add to that the fact that the outside is unreliable and always changing; it is constantly coming and going. No matter how much you want to keep your partner or your love from changing, they change. Resistance and grasping makes things worse; pushing love and lovers further away. There is a Zen saying that says it all:

“The tighter you squeeze, the less you have.”

In our own true experience, we all know that happiness based on the outside is temporary, but still we have repeated it, over and over, looking for the next person or thing to “make” us happy. As if that were true. So this is a kind of outright denial and delusion. We just haven’t known any better. We have mistaken the outside for the inside, and so we suffer the consequences of clinging to what inevitably changes. And we have not looked for love where it is, always was, and always will be—inside.

True love is not a bodily urge, not a rush of hormones or excitement. It is not a “flash in the pan,” here for a while and gone again. It cannot “fall out of love.” It does not narrow its focus on one person and depend on them, cling to them, or need them to do a certain thing and be a certain way—or not—in order for you feel ok. It is free, open, spacious, generous, and unlimited.

Because it is not outside you, because it is you, it is always with you, and always available to you, no matter what goes on around you. So long as you look for it outside yourself, you will always miss it, and therefore you will repeat the same error, over and over.

When I speak of my utterly fulfilled experience, being single, full of love and bliss beyond what I could have ever imagined possible, and beyond what I ever experienced due to any relationship people who have not discovered the true source of love and joy cringe at the idea of being alone. They often raise objections like, “We are not meant to be alone,” or some such other belief, most often formed from a bad, lonely experience. They cling to the memory of the temporary pleasure and temporary happiness (and temporary pain) that they have known, forfeiting the mind-blowing, infinite, eternal love, bliss, and peace they have not known but are capable of. It’s like trading a single peanut for an infinite, all you can eat international smorgasbord.

This is not to say that you should not be in a relationship. This is to say that by believing a relationship the source of your happiness, and seeking one and using one for that purpose, you will remain ignorant of truth, and perpetually ride the uncontrollable ups and downs of the ever changing, unreliable outside.

You can relate and be intimate with someone and simultaneously know the true source of love. From there, you have more to give than to take. When you are completely filled with love from the inside out, it spills over onto others and there is no limit, because the source is unlimited. When you truly love someone, you want them to be happy, even if that means letting them go. Love covers that much space.

I looked down at the puddle and a moment later heard the thought “water spilled on the floor.”

The obvious time delay in that thought arising was almost shocking, and I chuckled at the redundant comment from the “peanut gallery.”  Years ago I never even noticed the delay. Today, in this moment, it was never so obvious that thought comes after experience—and quite some time after!

Having been there and known the water spilled before mind commented is undeniable proof that that voice, that thought, is not me. I was there before; I saw the water spill first. For several years now I’ve know I’m not thought, but now that is no longer just a thought either; it is my direct experience. It is Truth. Of course, it always was Truth; I just didn’t know it.

Notice: the thought came and went but the water remained (and I remained to mop it up). How can I be a thought? So the “thinker” that I used to believe I was, inside this body, also is not true, never was true, never will be true. The idea of the thinker (a thought itself), is also separate from me, the Knower of both water and thought.

The water spill did not come before me, and the words did not come before me. In order for either to be known, I had to be prior; I am already the case.

There is nothing to gain in order to know Truth. What must happen is that we lose the false. Believing yourself to be “the thinker” you miss the gap—the gap between actual experience and the secondary thought about experience. Begin to notice the gap of the mind, and it will help you stop believing that you are the thinker—and that will help you mind the gap.

The brain is just a reflex organ. I’ve heard it estimated that the mind is capable of generating a thousand thoughts per hour. Can you imagine doing that? Of course not, but it is happening. You are not doing any one of the thousands of automatic things the body does, every moment. The body pumps blood, but you don’t say or believe that you are the pumper.

Believing you are the thinker, and therefore believing the few thoughts that you happen to notice, mistaking them for truth, causes all kinds of grief, for yourself, and others. Question every thing, every thought, and especially question the thought that you are “the thinker,” because while you do not generate thought, are not the thinker, and cannot stop or control thoughts, you are the power that brings a thought that you believe to life, in your experience—or not.

It is never the event that causes suffering. Spilled water merely flows naturally, effortlessly, and nothing more. It is always an after thought (and they are all after thoughts) that we can suffer over. Be very clear, it is never something or someone “outside” of you that emotionally hurts you; suffering is optional.

As for me, I just flowed naturally, effortlessly, and moped up the water.

Another moment later another thought, “I guess this spot needed more cleaning,” arose, and I smiled, with seeing as clear as pure water that although “the thinker” thinks he or she knows something, the truth is that the event happens first, and the comments come after.  It is so obvious that now I wonder how we could have ever have believed otherwise.